1 year

I officially made 1 year in Seattle. July 2016 marks my 1 year, from Honolulu to Washington. It has been 1 year and I must say, a lot, and I mean a lot, can happen in 1 year.

What do I miss most about Hawai’i? Other than my mother; our mom and daughter days out, crusing to the grocery store of Tamura’s, buying the ingredients for her ‘ono (delicious)  Kare Kare, window shopping at Pearlridge and Waikele, soaking up the afternoon sun and talking about everything and just anything. Of course there are my sisters I have known since Intermediate school days. Our weekly outings to our favorite Thai restaurant, Souvaly’s, ordering up Pad Thai noodles, Yellow Curry, Papaya Salad, Thai Iced Tea with sticky rice on the side.

1 year in Seattle and I already miss Hawai’i and my family and friends. Of course, that is normal to be homesick and think about the ones I love back home. Now that I am here, off the rock, my first home, sky’s the limit in this ever so green state. So much to do, so many finish lines to cross, and so many more dreams to dream. There are days where I sit back and wish I was sitting on the sands of Sunset Beach, breathing in the fresh salt water. But then I stop and tell myself I am more than lucky to be here.

So many faces to see, so many roads to travel on. There may have been hills I had to climb over, but damn, I climbed over them slowly and surely, I got right back up. I looked over and found more hills, but I’m not stopping there. I remember hearing some say that I shouldn’t be here…but look now…

1 year and many more to go.

 

what do you wanna be?

When I was 7 years old, I wanted to be some kind of dancer. A street dancer, dancing to Salt ‘n Peppa. When I got to the age of 11, I wanted to become a dancer for Britney Spears. But when I got to my senior year of high school, I knew right then and there I wanted to become a high school counselor. I was destined to be one. I mean, I took an elective class and even went on field trips to shadow high school counselors too! Shoot, I was unstoppable.

Then, reality hit. I graduated high school. I walked into this weird place…called the “real world” and that dream of becoming a high school counselor faded. I started having post high school stress, I ventured, I did all the things I was not able to do in high school, in my first years of college. I needed to vent, so I met my first real journal. So I wrote. I started to write more and more every day….words became my only weapon. I wrote so much I started to have another dream form…I wanted to become a journalist. A journalist sitting, twirling in my own, black, leather chair at the top of the 20th floor in a huge city where the lights shined too bright for me, but I didn’t care. I was unstoppable…again.

Then, I hit my mid 20’s. I was having a mid 20 melt down (so to say). Journalism was a “could be” type of job, but I wanted to do more. Not only more for me, but more for the people around me. Helping society and contributing to the social welfare of people, I wanted to then become a substance abuse counselor. 3 years went by, and I told myself that this was not the job for me. I thought and thought hard. I was always around elderly people. Especially with my family who work around patients and clients. I always had a soft heart for the elderly. I knew deep down in my heart that I wanted to stay in the social work field.

This time, being 29 years of age, I knew sticking in this field of work was my calling. My calling of having a soft heart when it came to assisting a fragile hand, guiding them, accompanying an elder to their table, helping them finish a task or even just simply speaking with them when no one else is there for them to talk to. Our elders are the ones who have helped the younger generations grow, now this is the time for us to return the favor and be there for them.

I was at a stop. At a stop when I asked this question to myself “What do you wanna be?” I had years of myself changing pathways and goals, but that’s life. Things change, people change and paths changes. It’s normal to drift off on another road, just as long as you come back and finish the road you started…its all a journey from there.

I am just so thankful for the loved ones I look up to as role models. You all inspire me. You all know who you are. I love you guys.

 

12

Sunday.

Seahawks first game of the 2016 NFL Season.

Seattle Seahawks VS Miami Dolphins.

Back on O’ahu, I never had a football team to root for. Actually, I wasn’t much of a football fan. But, my family has been representing the Seahawks since forever and now that I live here…why not? Represent a team with so many fans filling up the CenturyLink field with a sea of blue and green, roaring yells and screams, thousands of the “12th” flag flying in the wind.

When I first stepped onto the grounds of Washington, all I could feel was a strong sense of togetherness, unity, oneness, alliance…all in all “ohana”. Everyone, as one, comes as a group, rockin’ the #3 Wilson jersey, with #24 Lynch Beast Mode, along with the other superman players that have led them into wins and even the victory of Super Bowl XLVIII in 2014 against the Denver Broncos.

The feeling of another Seattle-an wearing Seahawks gear excites me that we have something in common…a feeling of being able to relate to one another. Am I a band wagon er? I would’t call myself one, as this is my first football team that I am rooting for. So I would call myself a fan of the Seahawks.

The excitement and “on the edge of your seat” emotion is exhilarating when the Seahawks play. Pure thrills.

12 – ready for this season…

Are you?

#GOHAWKS

and she is back…

free write.

just write, they said. and i am back, i said.

it’s been a while since i have dove into a blank square box; the excitement is back. so many words left unsaid. so many memories i am glad to share with the world. the fall is near, the colors of maroon, brown, beige, olive green is awaiting to burst and smear onto sweaters, scarves and socks. the feeling of thanksgiving lingering. however, don’t forget hallow’s eve. but many stores are not afraid to sell x-mas decor in the month of october. 😉

the holidays in the city. can’t be that…but how i would love to enjoy the sand on my legs on christmas eve, watching the waves crash onto the shore of Sunset Beach. i can dream right?

1 year into this city. i haven’t even witnessed half of this city Seattle. i’m not getting any younger – the life i live day to day, i make the most of it, one minute at a time.

 

i’m back…and no…i’m not going anywhere. i am staying right…here.

Ready, set, GO.

She’s a bit quiet. Quiet enough for her to hear every sound that trickles by her. She slowly and carefully weaves her way through these avenues that have been paved for her.

Trying to find her direction in a new town of unfamiliar faces, she puts her head down.

She is ready to soar, but not sure if the world is ready for her to fly just yet.

Questioning and wondering when is the right time to let the universe peer at a smile that is waiting to be shown.

She walks a bit slower than the others, speaks softly than the rest, but the words trapped in her mouth – the beauty and meaning of it all is patiently sitting on the tip of her tongue.

But she holds back.

Held back from the critics and feared by the judges, her head is still down.

But wait.

This new town is sparkling. Sparkling with spotlights, lime lights, green lights – GO.

Her head gradually rises up.

She plunges back and witnesses life moving quick before her eyes. Time is not waiting for her. No one is waiting for her.

Beneath that baseball cap covering her dark brown eyes, she’s aware.

Aware of the allurement she has been missing.

The secrecy of this earth she steps on – anticipating to unravel.

The doors that are closed and what is behind, lingers memories blooming silently.

Her chin up, rising up to all.

She steps forward and enters this creation.

 

Ready, set, GO.

Seattle nights.

 

Seattle nights.

The air is a bit chilly. Enough for me to take a deep breath as I watch a cloud escape between my glossy lips. Bundled up in a maroon scarf wrapped around my neck softly, jeans that fit perfectly around my waist and legs; brown boots protecting my shivering toes.

I step onto this gravel leading me into a city of wonder. The lights are shining bright, but not too bright to blind me from any chaos or misfortunes that may creep up my way. Trying to stay warm in my olive green rain jacket – I find comfort. A little drizzle tickles the tip of my nose.I continue down the streets.

Seattle nights.

The air is getting heavy – the air is getting cold.I walk in between a crowd; a variety of people. Laughing is a couple leaning against a wall in front of a bar.

The woman flirts innocently, a bit tipsy in front of her partner – but her smile glows. The gentleman grabs her hand and kisses it, pushing her hair behind her hair- they both exchange their joy.

Walking into these streets, beauty captivates me – the artistic moving waves from thousands of people over power the water coming down from the night sky.Nothing can stop this city from flowing into the midnight and into the morning hour of 7:00 A.M.

Seattle nights.

a note to you:

fragile hands/10 fingers, you are still so strong to guide our spirits up, when we need to be lifted off of this ground. we are surrounded by cracks on this pavement, we are scared to fall through.

the curvy lines engraved in your skin, but still so beautiful to the eyes. no need for the sheer powder that you are trying to cover up; the tiredness, endless days and nights of labor. you are a masterpiece.

your heart, bigger than anyone else’s in this world. love so endless you have given the both of us,ever since the day you pushed us out with your strength. you are a warrior.

voice of reason, speaking out the wisest of all words to nurture us when we are in doubt. you are our guru.

no duplicate. you are the original.

love,

your children

 

Do you live in grass shacks?

What’s the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of Hawai’i or the other Hawaiian islands?

That guitar sounding luau music that people think is Hawaiian music? Or you think hula dancers walk around the island wearing coconut bras and grass skirts?

Well, if you’re one of those people that think that that is what Hawai’i is like, you are definitely…so…so…so…wrong.

No, we do not live in grass shacks and drink out of coconuts. And yes, we do have electricity there…if we didn’t have electricity, then how would we provide Waikiki city lights to guide all the drunk ones on the strip stumbling to Honolulu Zoo parking lot.

And no, you do not need a green card to travel to the islands. (Yes, people do think that).

And yes, we do have Wal-Mart, Costco, Safeway, McDonalds, Jack n the Crack, Taco Bell on the island. But we do yet to see an Olive Garden, Red Robin and Applebees there. Which I don’t think the islanders do need one when there is already Zippy’s, L&L and the other ‘ono grinds you can find throughout the island to fit our needs. Oh and Giovanni’s shrimp truck on the Northshore.

“So what do you do there? Sit on the beach and surf all day?” Well, yes, surfing is the number one sport on the island which we all cherish and embrace for all the water lovers. Everyone that honors Eddie Aikau, Duke Kahanamoku, the late Andy Irons (we will always remember), Kelly Slater and more all time professional surfers that has made their mark on the islands.

So much to see, do and eat while enjoying every inch of sun ray hitting your skin all throughout the seasons.

Even if the weather is unpredictable, you can still enjoy the warm Aloha feeling that everyone shares throughout Honolulu.

I remember traveling to the island of Lana’i and every driver that passed you, would share a smile and the “shaka” to you, even if they did not know who you were.

Now that is the spirit of Aloha – sharing the joy to someone else and passing it along to others.

Hawai’i will forever be my home, and I enjoy sharing my life stories and moments to new people that I meet.

Oh, and yes…Hawai’i is a US state and pidgin is an official language…better believe that.

ALOHA!

When was the last time you…

…got real excited about something?

Anything!

Could be a great restaurant you visited and the food was just incredibly delicious, you spent over $50.00 worth, a meal you could’ve made at home. Went to the most craziest party/club/bar, got real hammered and still made unforgettable memories with the ones you hold dear to you. Heard thrilling news from a family member or friend.

Or you just woke up one morning, thankful for what you have been offered, or worked hard for, smiled to yourself and said “It’s another day, a new day, and this is MY day.”

Excitement; the feeling you get when as a child your mother tells you if you’re good, you get to pick any Happy Meal you want…with soda too! That feeling when you look into the mirror on prom night, your dress is so golden, you can’t wait to see your date’s eyes shimmer along with all the glitter. That feeling you wait for, when you’re about to kiss her, and you head straight to her forehead, because you know damn well, forehead kisses mean so much more.

I haven’t felt so excited in a while.

One day it just clicked to me. One night over dinner, one of my closest friend asked me, “Whatever happened to you being a writer?” My dream of being a writer was created 11 years ago – and she remembered.

You believed. I shall conquer.

The feeling of excitement is a cycle. A consistent cycle.

Let’s all be excited for something…Anything.

What is your sign?

 

They say the Gemini’s motto is “I think, therefore I am.” I think, that I think, I think too much, and that gets me into trouble. Living up to that motto for myself, that is why I’m so quiet…I’m really thinking…I’m not anti-social, not entirely weird, and it’s not like I don’t like speaking in big crowds while everyone stares at me with gleaming eyes, itching on what I will say next which will lead me into becoming embarrassed (example of me thinking or assuming)…really, I’m just thinking…AND assuming. FML.

Ask me, “What is your zodiac sign?” and with no hesitation and full of pride, I will reply back, “I am a Gemini”. What is the reaction I receive back? Well…not too good. Hey, not all Gemini’s are crazy or, …just crazy. I am…unique. I may have a lot of emotions filled in this 4’11, 128 pound female body – one minute I am laughing about how stupid my friend looked in a picture last Thursday night, the next minute I am angry on how hungry I am to eat Pad Thai noodles. (They call me “hangry”).

Besides all of that, I am ME.

What is one thing that separates me from being different from other Gemini’s out here in this world?

Wouldn’t you love to know that part?

I am full of wonders and mysteries.

Sometimes, just sometimes, it’s hard for me to figure out myself.

Raised and born on an island 28 years of my life, I came to terms with myself that Northshore, O’ahu will always have the most warmest sunset out of all the sunsets on this earth, but beyond those waves there is that one thing.

It’s out there. Beyond those waves.

As I sit here, many miles away from the warmest sunset, I am in search of that “one thing” in the Evergreen state, Washington.

You ask, “What the hell are you doing there, away from the ever so famous Matsumoto Shave ice and Waimea Bay?

I respond back, “I am in search of…Whitney.”

You took a peek at my life. Interested in taking more than just a peek? Ever met an over-thinker, dug deep into their brain filled with un-told stories that is waiting patiently to burst out into this wild universe?

Well, here’s your chance.

Welcome.